Comments

1. 100% agree

   You've said it -- what was won overall? I think Corey did the right thing. Having been in an abusive family, sometimes you just don't see it when you're in the middle of it. I know that's hard to believe or understand... but it's true. But I'm proud of Corey. Very proud of him.

   4 months, 2 weeks ago In response to Shot Through the Heart

2. teasing

   I was teasing when I said that Nikki drills ABC's all day. I really, really was. I realize that she does much more than that. I KNOW. It really amazes me all that she does with my boys -- things I could never do. She has the patience of Job, and really challenges the boys to be better people. I'm amazed every day at the things she does with my boys. I don't have half her creativity or knowledge about kids. I want you guys to know that I was NOT trying to diminish what SAHMs do. I actually didn't choose to have my boys. They were all surprises (even while I was on BC). But I decided to keep them because their father and I love them. I can give them a good life. I teach them, read to them, play with them, cook with them. But I have to admit -- I like working. When I was a SAHM, I wound up clinically depressed. Not just because of staying home. But it contributed. So I did what was best for my boys and got someone who can do things like salt dough crafts (which I had no idea how to do before Nikki showed me). My boys have learned more and met more people with Nikki than they ever did with me. And I am able to carry on what she starts.

   4 months, 2 weeks ago In response to The Nanny Diaries

3. Misunderstood

   I think I've been slightly misunderstood... I wasn't saying that caring for children is oppressive. I was saying that forcing a women to stay home when that is not best for her or her family is oppressive. I have tried to stay home with my boys -- none of us were as happy as when I work. Like I said, it contributed greatly to depression -- and depressed mommies have a tough time doing what's best for their babies (kids in general). Just because I CAN stay home doesn't mean I should. What's healthiest for my kids is that they have a caring person there to help them, that they know mommy loves them and will always be there if they need her, and that they have a happy childhood. When I am depressed, my kids are not happy. It's just that way -- I'm incapable of caring for my children when I'm depressed. I mean, seriously depressed. Not just a little sad or tired. Clinically depressed. So sure... I could stay home. But it's not always the best thing for the kids. That's what I was trying to say.

   4 months, 2 weeks ago In response to The Nanny Diaries

Letter of Apology

When I was in high school I behaved particularly abominably to one teacher -- not to the extent as these young children, but still... I'm not proud of my behavior. My parents made me write a letter of apology and read it to the teacher so I wouldn't forget what I wanted to say. And you're right. Looking that teacher in the eye and apologizing -- reading my wrongs out loud and asking to make amends -- it changed me. And I haven't treated anyone like that since. I think twice. :D

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to Attack of the 3rd-Graders?

Love the way you think

I love the way you think. An age limit would be wonderful. Children are less likely to pay attention, and more likely to cause those around them to pay less attention. An age limit -- ingenious!!

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to Foul Ball

not my definition of responsibility

Yes, parents need to be responsible for raising their children -- teaching them values and such. But some mohers work because they are single, and some work because their husbands don't make enough to support the family. And others, like myself, work because they enjoy working and find fulfillment in contributing the community, as well as the family finances. I think I am just as responsible as you are -- I chose a nanny with my same values, and I teach my child and do his homework with him and show him that women don't have to be hidden away in the home. I am the one who tucks him into his bed at night and prepares his meals (the nanny just heats them up), and I take him on trips to the zoo and amusement parks and teach him to ride his bike. Not all women are the same. It's irresponsible to expect all women to find completion in the home -- to have little life outside of their family. For some women, this leads to depression. It's just another form of oppression. Women should do what comes best to them. In our family, I work because that is what keeps me happiest and allows me to take the best care of my children. Plus, I provided a job to a single mother who really loves children and finds fulfillment in drilling ABC's for eight hours a day. lol...

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to The Nanny Diaries

Do SOMEthing

I probably would have turned the child around myself so the light wasn't in his face. I'm a go-getter myself. But Miriam was definitely in the right. When there is a child's needs on the line... especially one so young. Babies can't tell us what's wrong, they can't change their own positions, they can't defend themselves in any way. It is up to the adults in their lives, and those around these children, to do something for them. RIGHT ON Miriam!!

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to The Nanny Diaries

Not so sure...

I don't think society and violence in tv and games can really play such a large part here. When you're that young, you experience intense emotions, and you're not always sure what to do with them. As a young child I was kept from TV and video games and movies of all kinds. Yet when adults in my life were "unfair" I often fantasized of hurting them back. I've grown and changed a lot since then, and learned that retribution is not the answer. I think these kids should definitely get some help -- someone to help them recognize and deal with emotions in a healthy way. I think the kids should be removed from that teacher's classroom, and split up if possible. They should have to do some sort of community service and some sort of therapy. Rather than detracting from society (plotting to kill a teacher) they need to learn to contribute. I actually feel more for the kids -- how angry and frustrated they must have felt, and that they felt they had noone to turn to. They had to feel so powerless, and this was one thing they COULD do. Parents and authority figures need to teach them alternatives and respect for authority (even if we don't agree). And noone said... KUDOS to the kid who reported the group. Did that kid get rewarded for doing the right thing despite the pressure the other kids would have put on him?

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to Attack of the 3rd-Graders?

Better Choices since then...

I don't really blame him for going by a different name -- it could signify that by choosing a new name he has chosen a new life. But I wonder a few things... Did he legally change his last name, or did he just make one up? Did he choose to be a doctor to "atone" for his past mistakes? And if he still maintains his innocence and he still served the time... Well, I would give him a chance. His past might unfortunately warrant extra observation during school and work, to be sure he doesn't impose his morals on his patients. But I think the choices he seems to have made since this thing in his past would point toward his desire for a better future.

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to Killer Doctor

Buttercream Gang

Reminiscent of the idea behind Buttercream Gang.

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to Mandy & Lester

Right ON Bill

I love what Bill has to say about not imposing our morals on others. He's right. At the same time... When you choose to raise a child (as opposed to using Birth Control or giving babies for adoption), you choose a lifestyle that like it or not revolves around children and their needs for a while. If you want an adult experience, experience it with Adults. Or go to McD's or Burger King with other moms. That's what I do. Drink at home if you can't afford a sitter. It's cheaper that way anyway.

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to Babies in the Bar

I agree wholeheartedly

I couldn't have said it better. If you buy the tickets, you assume the risk. Pay Attention!

4 months, 3 weeks ago In response to Foul Ball

Part of life

Conflict is a part of life. If you're not willing to let go from time to time, and stand for what you believe in without wavering other times, then you're going to have a really rough life. Compromise is good at times and has it's place -- but it's really about neither person getting what they want.

5 months, 1 week ago In response to Dinner for Two

On the other hand

On the other hand there was the gentleman who, when asked if he would ever consider cheating on his wife, even if he knew he would never be caught, replied "No." and it was true. What people choose to do in their lives affects what truths they tell on the show. She knew what questions had been asked, and could have told her husband. At the same time, if I had been asked these questions, I would not have embarrassed my husband by still going on the show. But the show isn't responsible. They're a little greedy (so far as ratings go), but they aren't responsible for the loss of her marriage. They didn't cheat on her husband, and they didn't marry a man they didn't love. If anything, these two people should thank the show that they didn't have to keep living a lie for fifteen or twenty more years before it all broke down anyway. At least now it's all out in the open, and they can decide what to do about it together.

5 months, 1 week ago In response to Moment of Truth

Tough Call

People do need to be aware that just as powerful as the spoken word, and sometimes more powerful, is the written word. What people say about another person can be hurtful -- even from strangers on the internet. On the other hand... I agree with the woman. One or two comments on the internet would not make such a difference to a person with a stable mind. Obviously there was more to the picture here. Yes, the blogger should apologize for her hurtful words, but in no way is she responsible for what this man did to himself. "No one can make you feel inferior without your permission." Eleanor Roosevelt

5 months, 1 week ago In response to Death by Blog?

You said it

If he knew -- he's just as responsible, if not more so, for enabling them to do it for free. If he didn't know, then the poor guy needs a new lawyer, and the judge needs to reassess whether he allows common sense or politics to rule the court.

5 months, 1 week ago In response to Driven

Ridiculus

This woman did the right thing. Sure, she could have parked in the street, but someone else could have run into her car and hurt her and themselves, and then the guy would still be no better off, and I feel the two assailants would be responsible for that. These two men need to man up and take responsibility for what they did, rather than pass the buck onto the next available victim. How rude can you be?

5 months, 1 week ago In response to Samaritan or Killer?

How Special

This sort of kindness is so rare. Thank you for posting about that lady, and reminding me to take an extra minute from time to time to see how I could help. What can I lose?

5 months, 1 week ago In response to Welcome to The Responsibility Project

Define what responsibility means to you.