Boomerangers: Back to Mom and Dad
In Australia they’re known as “kippers”—Kids in Parents’ Pockets Eroding Retirement Savings.
In America they’re called “boomerangers”—adult offspring who return to live with their parents, sometimes bringing a spouse and children, unable to financially make it on their own.
Everywhere they have been the stuff of sitcoms and punch lines: irresponsible losers adding to the sofa’s sag while subtracting from the kitchen cupboards.
But the freeloader image may be inadvertently falling away, a welcome casualty of the ongoing recession, which, in some cases, is helping reshape what it means to be a responsible American family in an era of mounting crises.
A married Utah couple who could no longer make ends meet moved into his parents’ basement. “Staying close to your family in times of need, that’s the most important thing in the economic crises,” the husband said. His wife added, “It’s sad that people feel like they can’t turn to their families for help, or they feel like there’s something bad in doing that.”
Boomerangers are now more likely to help than loaf, splitting the costs of food and shelter in their parents’ homes and sharing domestic responsibilities. “As Americans face tougher economic conditions, we’ll likely see more of this,” said a vice president for AARP, which recently analyzed census data and recognized some new changes in families. In the past year, more than a third of retirees have had to help their offspring pay bills. More adult children are living with their parents, continuing an upward trend since 2000. And the number of multi-generational households has increased from 5 million in 2000 to 6.2 million in 2008.
“Kin is becoming the safety net of last resort,” wrote one reporter, “in part because overwhelmed social service agencies are reaching their giving limits.” A social services expert added, “Families, friends and social networks are becoming more important ways that people are coping.”
Tell us what you think: Is it still parents’ responsibility to launch self-sufficient adult children into the world? What would you do if your adult kids wanted to move in and be bailed out?
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Adult children living at home and not sharing ...
I agree 100% with the young lady who wrote about your adult children taking their money and having fun and not helping with the expenses. I have a 21 year old female with a three year old child. She has a car payment, child care, cell phone bill and that’s it. She doesn’t even contribute to the grocery bill. She’s the type of person who is considered a moocher. She eats out when she gets paid and then when she doesn’t have money to eat out, she asking what we are going to eat. These kids really need to grow up quickly. I really want to get this young lady out of my house.
MYRA BEST | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Offspring moving home
If this happens to one of my children, you bet your bottom dollar they would be welcome home with open arms. Yes they would have to get jobs and we would all work things out together if that is the way they want to do it. Don’t get me wrong they would have to share the expenses right along with us but at least I would be able to get a good night sleep knowing they have a roof over them.
violet tenney | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Adult children moving home ...
Where is the rule that says when our kids become 18/20 our responsibility ends? No, it does not. If my children needed to move home, it would be understood upfront that it’s only until they get back on their feet and the extra bills, food, lights, etc., would have to be helped by everyone. I could never turn my child away if he really was in a circumstance to maybe be homeless and here I sit in my home where his/her bedroom used to be. Then, if there are grandchildren, that compounds the circumstance. They are the innocent victims of very bad planning by very wrong past and present government.
N. WOLFE | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Maybe it will bring back family values
I think that America might be catching up to some of the rest of the world or cultures. In many cultures the older folks are valued, admired and taken care of in their old age. Maybe with the move back home younger people will learn to value their parents more and they can grow old and older together and raise the grandchildren up in an environment rich with values and history. Maybe we could even get back to the family all having dinner together, in home babysitting, furthering education because it can be afforded if I live at home, in home tutoring! Wow! The list of benefits could go on and on.
Juanita Lightfoot | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Mrs.
Family should always support each other. It has only been in the last 2 generations that it was acceptable for a single family member to not live with some member of his/her immediate or extended family. In past generations, children returned to live with and assist parents and grandparents or elderly relatives lived with children/grandchildren because such arrangements were fiscally responsible, emotionally supportive and considered honorable. When did it become a “burden” to be part of a loving, supportive family network?
Momwoods | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Boomerangers; Back to Mom and Dad ...
I think we should welcome them home letting them know that they have to go half on everything and that they are there hopefully for a short period of time and encourage them to go job hunting and maybe find a smaller place to rent something they can afford because no matter how old you get as parents you need your space and your privacy. I love to see them come and I love to see them leave enough is enough. Just got a chance to enjoy some of life when they became adults and they are back home. I think they should work very hard to move on.
Helen Parker | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Living, growing and giving in harmony
I grew up in a household with 3 generations. It was the 50’s and it was wonderful. I had 2 sets of parents: my own and an aunt and uncle. Two cousins who were as close (closer) than siblings and an Abuela (yes, we are Spanish) and a wonderful great-aunt. Everyone worked but my mother and grandmother. They took care of the house and the children. My aunt and father shared “car” duties. The cousins went to the same school. Since my memories of those times were so good I asked my mother. Not so long ago…did I imagine the love, warmth and harmony. No, she told me. “It really was like you remember.” When we finally moved, it was because the house was bursting and we only moved a few blocks away. My cousins and I agree that going between the two houses was like going into different rooms of the same house. The love, discipline and encouragement stayed the same. We should strive for more of these multi generational homes.
Michelle Land | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Fed up mom
I certainly do believe families should help each other…always. That does not mean helping one to avoid their responsibilities, but it does mean helping those that are trying and due to circumstances out of their control need a helping hand. I think of the old days when families lived together and worked their land together for food and such and I think it was awesome. I did not live in that but I believe we will see even a bigger need for such things in the very near future. We have become way too dependent on government to provide for us rather than providing for ourselves. This gives the government way too much control of our lives and the bottom line is, they really don’t care on an individual basis, and only how it looks for their political party. I for one would be very happy to have my family close and all helping each other to be successful and making our own way, together. Our forefathers were very intelligent people. We really should follow their example more. I am fed up with children being taught they should not have to listen to their parents and they should be able to make their own choices. Where are these people when; there choices destroy families or even end lives. Our society has lost sight of what is important all in the name of “if it feels good do it now and let someone else worry about it later”. We need to stand up and take our families back and in doing so we will take our country back. We truly reap what we sow. And the crops are not good anymore. We can change it, but we must do it soon.
Ginger
Ginger
Ginger Duhon | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Mr
I am currently working and living in Kosovo. The cultural and language are Albanian and part of their cultural is a strong family bond. It is not the exception but the rule that children, after marriage, move into the parents’ house. The entire family contributes to the welfare and well-being of all of the family. Those fortunate enough to be income earners support the other family members who do not have jobs, and they do this without complaint. I wonder what has/is happening to our American society when it is questioned about children moving back to their parents’ house. If Americans are this selfish and self-centered then it is time to reset our moral compasses.
Michael J. Gannon | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Boomerangers - adult children who return
My husband and I raised two daughters with the same values that we both had as young people, you work for what you get in life, get an education, learn how to do something either a trade like my husband, electrical engineer specializing in telephony, or secretarial skills like myself, who is the only college drop out in our family. Our oldest daughter is self-sufficient, unmarried no children and living in her second house. Our youngest daughter just finished law school and took the Bar Exam in our state with a 5 year old son. As this daughter had a job offer rescinded because of the economy, we offered her the chance to come home with her son, however, she is keeping her apartment where she went to school, working at the college part-time, and doing other jobs specializing in law research on the side. The younger daughters said that our home is not big enough for her, her son and her Father. My daughters are self-sufficient and want to do it on their own, legally. This is how we raised them, and we moved all the way from the East Coast to the West Coast by ourselves, with just my husband, me and our oldest daughter who was 3 at the time.
Shelby Carmichael | 10 months, 1 week ago
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