Babies in the Bar
So this baby walks into a bar, and …
Well, the baby didn’t actually walk into the bar—it was in a stroller, pushed by its mother, who was going to have a drink or two with some other moms who brought their kids, and…that’s why this is no joke.
There’s a bar fight brewing across the country. In Seattle, Austin, Philadelphia, Boston and beyond, bar patrons are getting lathered up on both sides of a polarizing parenting issue: is it responsible (or even acceptable) to belly up to the bar with young children in tow?
Those opposed to the mix of cocktails and sippy cups have posted their unequivocal sentiments on numerous online message boards and blogs, like this one in Philadelphia: “I do not want to be in a bar around children. Ever. Bars are for adults.”
Stroller grid-lock has been increasing in bars—often under signs that say “No One Under 21 Admitted”—along with the irritation of patrons who object to shoving crayons out of the way of their cosmos.
Those pushing for more kids in more bars are usually the same people pushing the strollers: mothers of the pre-school set, who say: “We want to do everything we always did, but with our babies.”
So when the owner of a bar in Brooklyn recently posted a “Please No Strollers” sign, he opened yet the latest front in the battle of the bottle. Moms seethed, while critics— like this one in Tucson —applauded: “Grow up, people,” she wrote. “Your lives are different now.”
Tell us what you think: Are we lowering the responsibility bar by allowing kids in the neighborhood bar?
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Rachael
I am totally stunned that I am even reading an article like this. If you are not ready to take the responsibility to care for a child, then don’t have one!! This means protecting your child. Not only are you exposing your child to alcohol, you are also exposing them to cigarette smoke, possibly fighting, and a greater chance of hurting or possibly killing your child on the car ride home! There are so many other things you can choose to do with your friends that you can involve your children in SAFELY. If you decide that you want to meet up with some friends at a bar for some drinks then get someone to babysit your kids. Or meet at a restaurant that is meant for kids, but even more important have a designated driver. Your kids don’t need to be exposed to the atmosphere that comes with a bar. Why do you think the sign says MUST BE 21 TO ENTER? I partied all the time before I became a mom, but the day I found out I was pregnant for my daughter it wasn’t “my life” anymore. I’m not putting women down for wanting to have some drinks with their friends but have some class and find other ways to go about it because I’m sure you look pretty trashy walking into a bar pushing a stroller.
Rachael Hays | 11 months, 1 week ago
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Sad Reality
It is a sad reality that this occurs. As a teenager I used to go to bars frequently with family members. That way we all knew each other was safe. Whether we were drinking or not, we were together and sometimes just went in to get a meal prepared by a friendly face. As soon as I began having children I made it a rule not to go any place that I could not morally or legally take my children also. This included any place that stated No Under 21 on the door. There is reason for this policy and when they got old enough to stay with a sitter and I wanted to go out on a holiday with friends that was different. I do believe that people had good comments on this as being firmly against drinking and driving. I believe taking an infant or toddler into a bar ( I am talking about a regular corner type pub who soul purpose is to have drinks – not the neighborhood grill that happens to have a bar in it as there are other reasons to attend such place and is more family oriented etc..) however to take a baby to a pub is completely irresponsible parenting. You want the same freedom. Parents must put the child first. Pub’s /Bars are places designed for grown-ups to drink, children are put in undo danger in such places. There are bar fights, the possible stray ball from the pool table, and if one is out to get drunk how can they take responsibility for a child’s safety in there care if they even accidentally have a few too many drinks. If they end up going home with a stranger, that is putting the child’s safety at risk also, if they are in stroller maybe they walked to avoid drunk driving, but what about all the drunks pulling out of the parking lot. I feel this is deliberately endangering a child for what a night out or a few drinks. Get a sitter or sign up for Alcoholics Anonymous because obviously there are issues if there is anything more important to you than the health and safety of a precious child ( it also isn’t fair to the other parents who are stressed from the everyday routine and have been responsible to hire a sitter so they can enjoy a night out with adult etc..). It all boils down to this is, a sad reality that this occurs, but think before you act on such things because everything you do with your children will in the end effect how they are as teenagers and adults.
ProudMomma | 10 months, 3 weeks ago
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Sad Reality
It is a sad reality that this occurs, as a teenager I use to go to bars frequently with family members that way we all knew that eachother was safe whether we were drinking or not we were together and sometimes just went in to get a meal prepared by a friendly face, as soon as I began having children I made it a rule not to go any place that I could not morally or legally take my children also. This included any place that stated No Under 21 on the door, there is reason for this policy and when they got old enough to stay with a sitter and I wanted to go out on a holiday with friends that was different. I do believe that pp had good comments on this as being firmly against drinking and driving I believe that taking an infant or toddler into a bar ( I am talking about a regular corner type pub who soul purpose is to have drinks – not the neighborhood grill that happens to have a bar in it as there are other reasons to attend such place and is more family oriented etc..) however to take a baby to a pub is completely irresponsible parenting, you want the same freedom – Parents must put the child first. Pub’s /Bars are places designed for grown-ups to drink, children are put in undo danger in such places – There are bar fights, the possible stray ball from the pool table , and if one is out to get drunk how can they take responsiblity for a child’s safety in there care if they even accidently have a few too many drinks , if they end up going home with a stranger that is putting the child’s safety at risk also and if they are in stroller maybe they walked to avoid drunk driving but what about all the drunks pulling out of the parking lot , I feel this is deliberatly endangering a child for what a night out or a few drinks , get a sitter or sign up for Alcoholics Anonymous because obviously there are issues if there is anything more important to you than the health and safety of a precious child ( it also isn’t fair to the other parents who are stressed from the everyday routine and have been responsible to hire a sitter so they can enjoy a night out with adult etc..)
It all boils down to this is a sad reality that this occurs but think before you act on such things because everything you do with your children will in the end effect how they are as teenagers and adults.
ProudMomma | 10 months, 3 weeks ago
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United States
There is no way a child should be allowed in a bar for any reason!
Pamela Jenkins | 10 months, 2 weeks ago
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Raising children to be alcoholics
I’m a child of an alcoholic and my mom tried as hard as she could to keep me away from the whole lifestyle, but my dad acted like there was nothing wrong with it. When I started getting into trouble my dad didn’t see his part in it, and continued to think it was all in fun. Children look up to their parents. Maybe if we as parents were better role models and didn’t act like it’s ok to waste our life drinking it away, but instead, took our children to the park , the zoo, camping, fishing, the good old things parents used to do, there would be less lost souls out there! I would never take my child to a bar. I love him too much to introduce him to that lifestyle!
amanda | 10 months, 1 week ago
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Babies in bars
Please! Babies belong in playgrounds not bars with mommy getting drunk. Its just wrong.
Christy Vincelette | 9 months, 3 weeks ago
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come on
I’m sure I would never do this-take a kid to a bar-but I’m not a drinker at all-not even the occasional drink.
I do think its ok to have one drink, however, with your child in tow, WITH DINNER. And not at a bar, but a place like a restaurant that has a bar which serves drinks. How many of you have brought your little one to those places or other establishments like it? Ok then. We all know these ladies did nothing wrong. If its one drink and there’s several of you, all of you have your baby, and you are all eating dinner as well, then its a non-issue. You all act like they brought their babies to a biker bar. I seem to recall a poster a while back saying she knew one of the ladies involved here, and it was a situation like I outlined-family bar/grill, lots of kids in tow, dinner ordered and enjoying a glass of wine with a meal.
Enough said. Stop blowing something so trivial out of proportion!!
celeste good | 9 months, 1 week ago
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quoting shelli
“As someone who knows some of these moms – let me clarify a bit.
A large (non-smoking bar) in NYC, during the daytime, that serves lunch – more like a restaurant that serves alcohol. Stay at home moms getting together to share camaraderie, diapers, and a bit of laughter in a LONG day.
Now, those of you judging a situation that you do not know, might you re-think your positions? Should these moms STILL be refused a chance to join together for a meal, and yes, even (gasp, horror!) a glass of wine?
I think not. And I’m constantly amazed at how people JUMP all over someone for something you read on the INTERNET, without having first hand knowledge of a situation.
If only those who judge and are SO indignant could be so indignant about the major crisises of the world, we’d all be better off…
Shelli”
I would like to quote her, as I referred to her earlier. Now that we all know the truth, can we all stop this and get off of our high horses?
celeste good | 9 months, 1 week ago
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word babysitters mean anything to these mothers
wow! what are these moms teaching their children my daughter is 2 an i could never put her through sitting in a stroller while cocktail hour begins were supposed to protect our children im a young mom in BC an ive never heard of such a thing im so appauled!!!!
jess | 5 months, 1 week ago
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Overreactions all around
Mary Duval,
You may wish to insult and judge others for, what the rest of the world considers to be, completely normal behavior. However, please leave your judgment at the door.
This is not a black and white, Bar or no Bar issue. I grew up in a country where it was perfectly acceptable for parents to bring their small kids into a bar during certain hours. I also live in a town, in the United States, where many parents bring children under the age of 8 to bars. It is understood that there are certain rules that govern this choice:
One, it takes place in the late afternoon, say 4:30-7:30 or so. It is understood that after a certain time of night Bars are for adults only, no children allowed. Children should be in bed by 7, anyways.
Two, the type of bar is also important, a local watering hole where you might meet other parents with their kids or a nice clean, well lighted place that may also serve some snacks, no smoking allowed, are perfectly okay for children.
Children should not be kept in a different world. It is important to make distinctions when it is necessary, but excessive sheltering of children from the reasonable social activities engaged in by adults (their parents and their friends parents) is overreacting. Perhaps that’s why our young adults have such problems with alcohol abuse. They have been denied participation in the real world and have no idea what to do when they get there.
roxana | 4 months, 4 weeks ago
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